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Love, an important ingredient for marital success

BY: Folashade Ajayi

Knowing that real love never ends, should help you understand there is no such thing as “falling in” and “out of love”.

Love is not primarily an emotion, but an attitude of the heart. Love is an unconditional giving of self to others regardless of the circumstances or condition. It is one of the major requirements for making any marriage work.

What It Means to Love Your Spouse

Have you ever thought about what you mean when you say the words, I love you to your spouse? In counseling people regularly declare their love for their spouse. However, if the person making this profession of love is struggling in their marriage, I usually ask them to define the word love for me. I ask for this definition because I have found that many couples struggle with loving each other in two ways.

The first is that they usually don’t understand the practical actions that are involved in loving another.

The second problem is much worse. Once a person knows how to love their spouse, they simply choose not to act on this knowledge. This failure to walk in love is the most common cause of problems in a marriage. Therefore, test your knowledge of what it means to love and determine if you are behaving in a manner that is helping or hindering your relationship.

 Love to a man is a command love unconditionally

    Submission to a woman is an act of obedience to God Love + respect – submission

Greek meaning of love for better understanding.

1. Phileo – is love on the level of casual friendship, marriage requires a deeper, more focused  love Phileo provides

 Phileo focus on personalities and physical attraction

Phileo tends to be ‘conditional’ love. As long as certain condition exist, the relationship exist.

2. Storge – the love of family

3. Eros – sexual love eros embrace sexual longing, craving, and desire, romantic love

4. Philia- shared experience-love for a shared goal

5. Ludus-flirting, playful affection

6. Philautia- self-respect, the joy in being true to our own values. The strength to care for

   ourselves, so that we can care for others- not selfish kind of love

7. Pragma-love which endures. Love between married couple; endures in sickness and lack

8. Agape – the divine love, unconditional love, sacrificial love. Without agape love forgiveness becomes difficult.

A Communication

Ways to enhance Communication

1. Be a good listener- good listener are good lovers

2. Be sincere- don’t say things that you don’t mean, speak clearly

3. Be mindful of correct timing- seek for the right time to talk

4. Be sensitive about the location- always choose right time and right place to say things.

5. Be sensitive about the manner of approach- the tone of your voice and posture. Treat your

   partner with utmost respect.

6. Gist, play, touch and gossip.

B   Knowing likes and dislike

Every partner should get to know what are the likes and dislikes of your spouse for the good interest of your relationship. Likes are those things that gladden your heart, which you always want to experience. Please protect as much as possible. E.g food; social activities; football

Dislikes are those things that annoy you, which you will not want anybody to do to you or give you. They distaste and upset you.

C   Understanding:

Family background, Cultural background, Educational background, Religious background, Social background

D. Be Patience

E. Intimacy

Types of intimacy

    Physical intimacy

    Emotional intimacy

    Sexual intimacy

How to fulfill your part.

1. Be willing to learn

2. Be ready to improve

3. Get education- Attend seminars, conference and read books

4. Communicate

Couples should understand that love has the power to cure all emotional anomalies, it helps to eliminate or minimize conflicts. Love makes marriage easier and blissful.

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Health

Superfoods to Boost Your Immune System

A strong immune system is essential for defending your body against illnesses and infections. While no single food can guarantee immunity, incorporating nutrient-rich superfoods into your diet can help strengthen your body’s natural defenses. Packed with vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants, these superfoods provide the building blocks your immune system needs to function optimally. Here’s a list of top superfoods to include in your diet for an immune system boost.

Citrus Fruits

Citrus fruits like oranges, grapefruits, lemons, and limes are well-known for their high vitamin C content. This powerful antioxidant helps stimulate the production of white blood cells, essential for fighting infections.

How to Include: Add fresh lemon juice to water, and enjoy an orange as a snack.

Yogurt

Yogurt contains probiotics that support gut health, especially varieties with live and active cultures. Since a significant portion of the immune system resides in the gut, maintaining a healthy microbiome is key to overall immunity.

How to Include: Opt for plain, unsweetened yogurt and add honey or fresh fruits for natural sweetness.

Sweet Potatoes

Sweet potatoes are an excellent source of beta carotene, which the body converts into vitamin A. Vitamin A is crucial for maintaining the health of mucous membranes, which act as a barrier to pathogens.

How to Include: Roast sweet potatoes with olive oil and spices, or mash them as a side dish.

Ginger

Ginger is a natural anti-inflammatory and antioxidant. It can help reduce inflammation and combat oxidative stress, which can weaken the immune system. Ginger is also beneficial for soothing sore throats and nausea.

How to Include: Brew fresh ginger tea, add grated ginger to smoothies, or use it in marinades and sauces.

Red Bell Peppers

Red bell peppers contain more vitamin C than most citrus fruits, making them a top choice for immune support. They are also rich in beta-carotene, contributing to healthy skin and mucous membranes.

How to Include: Slice raw peppers for a crunchy snack or roast them for a flavorful dish addition.

Turmeric

This vibrant yellow spice is known for its anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties, thanks to its active ingredient, curcumin. Turmeric may enhance immune cell activity and help the body fight infections.

How to Include: Stir turmeric into soups, curries, or golden milk lattes for a healthful boost.

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Health

Home Workouts: Effective Exercises You Can Do Without Equipment

You don’t need a gym membership or fancy equipment to stay fit. With some creativity and dedication, you can maintain your fitness routine from the comfort of your home. Bodyweight exercises—movements that use your weight for resistance—are incredibly effective for building strength, improving flexibility, and boosting cardiovascular health. Here’s a guide to effective equipment-free workouts for all fitness levels.

Benefits of Home Workouts

Convenience: Exercise anytime, anywhere without commuting to a gym.
Cost-Effective: No need for gym memberships or equipment purchases.
Customizable: Adapt workouts to your fitness level and goals.
Privacy: Work out in the comfort of your own space, free from distractions

Preparing Your Body

Before starting any workout, it’s essential to warm up to increase blood flow, loosen up your muscles, and reduce the risk of injury. Spend 5–10 minutes on these dynamic movements:

A full-body warm-up that gets your heart rate up.
Arm Circles: Rotate your arms forward and backward to loosen shoulder joints.
High Knees: Jog in place, lifting your knees to hip height.
Leg Swings: Swing each leg forward and backward to activate hip muscles.

Full-Body Workout

This workout targets multiple muscle groups, making it a time-efficient routine.

1. Push-Ups

Muscles Worked: Chest, shoulders, triceps, and core.

How to Do It:

Start in a high plank position with hands under your shoulders. Lower your body until your chest almost touches the floor. Push back up to the starting position.

Modification: Drop your knees to the ground for an easier variation.

2. Squats

Muscles Worked: Quads, hamstrings, glutes, and calves.

How to Do It: Stand with feet shoulder-width apart. Lower your hips back and down as if sitting in a chair, keeping your chest up. Return to standing.

Challenge: Add a jump at the top for squat jumps.

3. Plank

Muscles Worked: Core, shoulders, and back.

How to Do It:

Start in a forearm plank with elbows under the shoulders and the body in a straight line. Hold for 30–60 seconds, keeping your core tight.

Modification: Start with a high plank on your hands if the forearm plank is too challenging.

4. Mountain Climbers

Muscles Worked: Core, shoulders, and legs.

How to Do It:

Begin in a high plank position. Drive one knee toward your chest, then switch legs in a running motion.

Go as fast or slow as needed.

5. Glute Bridges

Muscles Worked: Glutes, hamstrings, and lower back.

How to Do It:

Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Lift your hips toward the ceiling, squeezing your glutes at the top.

Lower back down.

Burpees: A full-body cardio move involving a squat, jump, and push-up.

Skater Jumps: Jump laterally from one foot to the other like a speed skater.

Running in Place: Keep knees high and arms pumping.

Star Jumps: Jump explosively into a star shape, landing softly.

Cool-Down: Stretch and Recover

After your workout, take 5–10 minutes to cool down and stretch. This helps reduce muscle soreness and improve flexibility. Include these stretches:

Cat-Cow Stretch: Alternate between arching and rounding your back on all fours.

Hamstring Stretch: Sit with one leg extended, reaching toward your toes.

Child’s Pose: Kneel and extend your arms forward, resting your forehead on the ground.

Chest Stretch: Clasp your hands behind your back and lift slightly.

Sample 20-Minute Home Workout Routine

Warm-Up: 5 minutes

Circuit (repeat 3 times):

Push-Ups: 12 reps

Squats: 15 reps

Plank: 30 seconds

Mountain Climbers: 20 reps (10 per leg)

Glute Bridges: 12 reps

Cardio Burst: 2 minutes of burpees or running in place.

Cool-Down: 5 minutes

Tips for Success

Start Slow: If you’re a beginner, start with fewer reps or sets and gradually increase intensity.

Focus on Form: Proper technique prevents injuries and ensures effectiveness.

Stay Consistent: Aim for 3–5 weekly workouts to see results.

Listen to Your Body: Rest when needed and modify exercises as necessary.


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Health

Tips for Staying Fit, Heathy and Active in Your Later Years

Aging is a natural part of life, but maintaining health and vitality well into the later years is not only possible, it’s something to actively work toward. Staying fit and active as you age can improve your quality of life, boost your independence, and reduce the risk of chronic diseases. Here’s a guide on how to stay vibrant and energetic as you get older.

1. Stay Physically Active

Engaging in regular exercise is one of the best ways to age healthily. Physical activity helps maintain muscle strength, bone density, balance, and flexibility, reducing the risk of falls and injuries. Here are some recommended types of exercise:

Aerobic Exercise: Walking, swimming, cycling, or dancing can improve cardiovascular health. Aim for at least 150 minutes of moderate aerobic activity each week.

Strength Training: Lifting weights, using resistance bands, or body-weight exercises (like push-ups and squats) help preserve muscle mass and strength.

Flexibility and Balance Exercises: Yoga, tai chi, and stretching exercises enhance balance and flexibility, reducing fall risk and promoting mobility.

2. Eat a Balanced Diet

Good nutrition plays a critical role in aging healthily. Eating a variety of nutrient-rich foods provides essential vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants that help combat age-related health issues.

Focus on Whole Foods: Prioritize fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats. Avoid highly processed foods, sugary snacks, and excessive salt.

Calcium and Vitamin D: Strong bones are essential as you age. Ensure you get enough calcium (from dairy products, leafy greens, or fortified foods) and vitamin D (from sunlight exposure, fish, or supplements).

Stay Hydrated: Dehydration can become more common as you age, so make it a habit to drink plenty of water throughout the day.

3. Keep Your Mind Active

A healthy mind is just as important as a healthy body. Engaging in mentally stimulating activities can keep your brain sharp and may reduce the risk of cognitive decline.

Challenge Your Brain: Play puzzles, crosswords, chess, or Sudoku. Learning a new skill or taking up a hobby can also stimulate the mind.

Social Interaction: Socializing helps maintain cognitive function. Join clubs, volunteer, or stay connected with friends and family.

Reading and Lifelong Learning: Reading books, taking online courses, or attending workshops keeps your mind engaged and resilient.

4. Prioritize Sleep

Getting enough sleep is crucial for physical and mental well-being. As you age, sleep patterns can change, but maintaining good sleep hygiene is key.

Establish a Routine: Go to bed and wake up at the same time each day, even on weekends.

Create a Comfortable Sleep Environment: Ensure your bedroom is dark, quiet, and cool. Limit screen time before bed to promote better sleep quality.

Address Sleep Issues: If you experience problems such as insomnia or sleep apnea, consult a healthcare provider.

5. Regular Health Check-ups

Preventive care is essential for catching health issues early and maintaining your well-being.

Annual Physical Exams: Visit your doctor for regular check-ups and screenings for conditions like high blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, and cancers.

Hearing and Vision Tests: Addressing hearing or vision issues promptly can improve your quality of life and safety.

Vaccinations: Ensure you stay up-to-date with recommended vaccinations, such as flu shots and pneumonia vaccines.

6. Stay Connected and Purposeful

Maintaining strong social ties and a sense of purpose can boost emotional well-being and longevity.

Volunteer Work: Giving back to your community can provide a sense of fulfillment and foster social connections.

Pursue Hobbies: Whether gardening, crafting, cooking, or any other interest, hobbies keep you engaged and fulfilled.

Family Time: Strengthening bonds with family and loved ones contributes to a more satisfying life.

7. Avoid Risky Behaviours

Healthy aging also involves steering clear of habits that can undermine your health.

Don’t Smoke: Quitting smoking at any age can significantly improve your health and increase life expectancy.

Moderate Alcohol Consumption: If you drink alcohol, do so in moderation.

Practice Safety: Use seat belts, wear helmets when cycling, and take steps to prevent falls at home.

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