Lifestyle

Love, an important ingredient for marital success

BY: Folashade Ajayi

Knowing that real love never ends, should help you understand there is no such thing as “falling in” and “out of love”.

Love is not primarily an emotion, but an attitude of the heart. Love is an unconditional giving of self to others regardless of the circumstances or condition. It is one of the major requirements for making any marriage work.

What It Means to Love Your Spouse

Have you ever thought about what you mean when you say the words, I love you to your spouse? In counseling people regularly declare their love for their spouse. However, if the person making this profession of love is struggling in their marriage, I usually ask them to define the word love for me. I ask for this definition because I have found that many couples struggle with loving each other in two ways.

The first is that they usually don’t understand the practical actions that are involved in loving another.

The second problem is much worse. Once a person knows how to love their spouse, they simply choose not to act on this knowledge. This failure to walk in love is the most common cause of problems in a marriage. Therefore, test your knowledge of what it means to love and determine if you are behaving in a manner that is helping or hindering your relationship.

Love to a man is a command love unconditionally

Submission to a woman is an act of obedience to God Love + respect – submission

Greek meaning of love for better understanding.

1. Phileo – is love on the level of casual friendship, marriage requires a deeper, more focused love Phileo provides

Phileo focus on personalities and physical attraction

Phileo tends to be ‘conditional’ love. As long as certain condition exist, the relationship exist.

2. Storge – the love of family

3. Eros – sexual love eros embrace sexual longing, craving, and desire, romantic love

4. Philia- shared experience-love for a shared goal

5. Ludus-flirting, playful affection

6. Philautia- self-respect, the joy in being true to our own values. The strength to care for

ourselves, so that we can care for others- not selfish kind of love

7. Pragma-love which endures. Love between married couple; endures in sickness and lack

8. Agape – the divine love, unconditional love, sacrificial love. Without agape love forgiveness becomes difficult.

A Communication

Ways to enhance Communication

1. Be a good listener- good listener are good lovers

2. Be sincere- don’t say things that you don’t mean, speak clearly

3. Be mindful of correct timing- seek for the right time to talk

4. Be sensitive about the location- always choose right time and right place to say things.

5. Be sensitive about the manner of approach- the tone of your voice and posture. Treat your

partner with utmost respect.

6. Gist, play, touch and gossip.

B Knowing likes and dislike

Every partner should get to know what are the likes and dislikes of your spouse for the good interest of your relationship. Likes are those things that gladden your heart, which you always want to experience. Please protect as much as possible. E.g food; social activities; football

Dislikes are those things that annoy you, which you will not want anybody to do to you or give you. They distaste and upset you.

C Understanding:

Family background, Cultural background, Educational background, Religious background, Social background

D. Be Patience

E. Intimacy

Types of intimacy

Physical intimacy

Emotional intimacy

Sexual intimacy

How to fulfill your part.

1. Be willing to learn

2. Be ready to improve

3. Get education- Attend seminars, conference and read books

4. Communicate

Couples should understand that love has the power to cure all emotional anomalies, it helps to eliminate or minimize conflicts. Love makes marriage easier and blissful.

Entertainment

My mum is my God, my dad is my God’ — 9ice

Singer 9ice has sparked debate after saying his parents are his “God” and rejecting other deities, months after revealing he has practised as a Babalawo for 18 years.

9ice is once again at the centre of online debate after declaring that his parents, not any deity, occupy the highest spiritual place in his life.

In a video posted to his Instagram on Sunday, the artist said: “Today I’ll tell you something I don’t really talk about, but I’ll talk today. I love my mum, I love my dad, my god is my mum, my father is my god.” He went further in the comments, clarifying that the reverence typically reserved for an unseen God should instead be directed at one’s parents.

The singer didn’t stop there. “I don’t believe in inferior Gods,” he added, distancing himself from the worship of any other spiritual beings and insisting his belief system doesn’t fit neatly into traditional religious structures.

Predictably, the internet had thoughts, and most of them weren’t kind. A large chunk of reactions accused him of being under the influence of something, with many dismissing the statement outright rather than engaging with it.

This isn’t 9ice’s first brush with this kind of controversy, and that’s part of why the latest clip spread as fast as it did. Back in April, he went viral for a different but related rant, this time aimed squarely at Nigeria’s religious culture.

“You’ll leave Nigeria and go to Mecca to go and lick rock all in the name of Kabba,” he said then, arguing that decades of national prayer hadn’t translated into national progress. He compared Nigeria’s work ethic unfavourably to London’s, joking that between church on Sunday, Bible study on Wednesday and vigil on Friday, “when would you work?”

Some Nigerians found merit in his earlier point about productivity versus performative religiosity. Far fewer have extended that same patience to his spiritual claims, with both the Babalawo reveal and now this parental-deity comparison landing mostly as fodder for mockery rather than genuine reflection.

Entertainment

I Will Focus On African Music and culture – Davido

In a recent BBC 1Xtra interview, Davido revealed that his upcoming sixth studio album will be rooted in African sounds, marking a deliberate shift away from Western music influences.
In a recent appearance on BBC 1Xtra’s Official UK Afrobeats Chart Show, hosted by Congolese-British comedian and presenter Eddie Kadi, Davido offered what appears to be the clearest indication of where his music is headed next, emphasising his plan to decenter the West.

“This part of my career… I’ve performed everywhere, sold out every arena, been at all the award shows. I’ve been to three Grammys in the last three years. Now, I want to go back home. I want to go back to Africa. Even the music I’m recording now is very, very Davido African. I’m not focused on Western sounds. This one that’s coming next is very African,” he said.

Outside the casual interview quote, if we can recall, on his birthday in November last year, Davido subtly announced the coming of his sixth studio album. With this latest comment, he appears to be offering an indirect preview of what that project will sound like, indicating a deliberate pivot toward African audiences after years of building and consolidating a global presence.

It would not be the first time Davido has made that choice consciously. His fifth studio album, 5ive, released in 2025, was a commercial success anchored firmly in Nigerian identity. The album connected deeply with the markets Afrobeats had spent a decade cultivating across the continent, reflecting an artist who understood that the genre’s most loyal and most responsive audience had always been at home.

That conviction extended to his live shows. Last year, Davido held the 5ive Tour across five major Nigerian cities, including Lagos, Ibadan, and Enugu. It was a domestic tour that came at a time when major acts had largely abandoned the Nigerian touring circuit, and was widely commended as a statement of intent.

Entertainment

#SpotlightAfricaThrowbackSeries The Exclusive Wedding of Chief Sunday and Mrs Oluwatosin Oso in Akure

Joyful was the moment when the families of Oso in Ado-Ekiti and Ojo in Akure, Ondo State, as their children, Chief Sunday Oso and Mrs. Oluwatosin Ojo, formally sealed their lifelong union with an exchange of marital vows on November 6, 2021.

For the two lovebirds, the aura exuded nothing but love, as they both looked resplendent in their beautiful attire, gazing at each other with overwhelming excitement.

The event kicked off with a photo session by the couple at St. Jacobs Hotel, a 5-star hotel in Akure, Ondo State, which hosted notable guests from across Nigeria and abroad. At the same time, families, friends, and well-wishers converged at BAS Event Centre, Akure, Ondo State, the venue for both the traditional marriage and reception.

The two families expressed their joy as they warmly welcomed one another during the engagement. Guests were enlivened with rib-cracking jokes by the popular actress, Ronke Ojo, popularly known as Oshodi Oke, who anchored the event. The Ogbomoso-based Fuji maestro, Ramoni Akanni, did not fail to entertain guests with lively music. It was an all-you-can-eat menu accompanied by varieties of drinks, wine, and liquor.

Dignitaries in attendance include top politician, Hon. Olu Araoyinbo, Chairman, West Park Hotel, Mr Rasaq Oseni, Aare Khalif Adebiyi, Nigerian-based businessman, Mr Sesan Adelabu, Emirates, Chairman, St. Jacobs Hotel, Mr Babatope Adebiyi (Jafil), the Waziri of Ekiti State, Alhaji Ajijola, former Chairman, Ado-Ekiti Local Government, Hon. Chief (Mrs) Tosin Aluko, among others.

Hearty Congratulations to Mr and Mrs Oso!